News from the front [April 28, 2008]

Meet Too Tall.



Too Tall is a chocolate bunny that is, incredibly, too tall for his packaging. Too Tall is so tall, in fact, his ears have burst through the box top.

But is this the truth? Is Too Tall truly taller than his bunny comrades? It turns out Too Tall isn't tall enough.



As you can see, there is plenty of room in the bottom of Too Tall's box. His feet could rest comfortably on the real bottom, and there would be clearance between his "too tall" ears and the box top. There's no need for the hole.



Removed from his packaging, the effect is even more astounding. What would happen if you or I were to lie to little children like Too Tall is doing? Is his ego the only true thing bursting from the box?



I believe so. I believe Too Tall has an inferiority complex. It could stem from his hollow nature, or his average height, or a lack of a loving relationship in his parental rabbit den. Whatever the origin, Too Tall is simply telling a too-tall tale.

What kind of society have we become?

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In other news, I got promoted last Tuesday to "Senior Communications Specialist." That means I'll be doing more of this, and some other video- and web-based projects. Which is cool.

But it also means I have to toss out my unused business cards and order new ones. Not cool.

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Have a dirty...anything?

Two words: Magic Eraser.

I tried it out on my iBook this weekend, and it looks like a new friggin' laptop. Amazing. And all from simple abrasion.

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Running season is here again, and the new Nike+iPod kit is doing wonders. Just to have numbers (calories, average time per mile, etc.) to go along with my workouts is a dream come true.

What's better is the iPod Nano is so much better to run with than my clunky 30 GB model.

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Worked 24 hours in two days this weekend. Joy.

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A few birthdays, mine included, came and went without much celebration on my part, and I'm sorry for that.

Keith, hope your par-tay was fab.

Mine? Simple enough, and much appreciated. Just a nice relaxing weekend at home.

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Spring is here, which means the entire universe changes direction, and moods lift like evaporating snow.

This year, I've really started to pay attention to birds. Not just my good friend the whip-poor-will (who I swear I will actually lay eyes on for once), but also the cardinal and the starling and all the noise-makers who are so cheerful first thing in the morning.

Buds are budding, trees are greening, and the birds are returning, as they do every year, to fill our hearts with gladness.

Now to figure out which ones are making which noises.

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Speaking of noises, I got my bike fixed so that I can tackle the Falling Water Trail - all 10 miles (one way) of it to Concord.

A quick breakfast, and off I'll go on some sunny Saturday. Eat lunch in Concord, and bike back. If that isn't the perfect day, I don't know what is.

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And speaking of perfect, my BBQ chicken breast is sizzling. Off to dinner.

Running+

I started running last summer after seeing a set of podcasts that made the whole thing really easy. I even ran my first 5k (not a sponsored one, just me out running one night), the longest distance I had run since track season in high school.

Near the end of the season last year, I hurt my knee because of the way I run. It turns out that I roll my feet on the inside, which wears away the soles of my shoes and is rough on my knee. This season, now that the weather is breaking, I decided to grab some supporting Nikes. While I was at the shoe store, the salesman offered me the Nike+ sports set - which fit my style of shoe - and I decided to give it a try.

It seems like for $30 you'd get more, but the whole set only involves a little red and white sensor and a white plug-in receiver for your iPod Nano. Setup is super easy: simply put the sensor into the little hole in your shoe (you don't need a Nike shoe, either), and plug the other part into your iPod. That's it.

To calibrate the sensor, I charted a mile walk around a nearby park. The sensor read the mile distance very well, reading out "0.98 miles" by the time I reached the actual mile. After the calibration I set the iPod to a normal workout to see how it did. Here's what I got:



I only walked a mile, but it still charted my pace and how many calories I burned. Pretty cool. You can set your iPod to give you voiced encouragement (in male or female), and set it for miles or metric.

After iTunes logged my first "run," I went to the Nike+ site to upload my info, and it showed me a cool visualization of the whole thing:



But that's where I got my first hiccup. I tried registering for the Nike+ community stuff, and accidentally logged my birth year as "2008." The site then froze, saying "children under age 13 are not allowed to register." After logging off, then logging back into the sight with Safari, it was still locking me out. A quick call to Nike HQ, and a friendly guy name Mike (who works on a Sunday!) told me that the site resets these kinds of things after two hours.

I waited until Monday afternoon to try again, entering my true birthday, and things were smooth sailing. I set a goal for myself, and typed in a resolution:



There at the top, it shows my profile information and custom icon. It also logged my mile-long Sunday walk. The coolest part of the whole deal is the challenges.



People from around the world post challenges based on distance, most miles accumulated, fastest time running a certain distance, and a distance goal - say, 50 miles during a month. You can do it individually or in teams, and if you meet the challenge you get awarded a trophy. I signed up for a few simple challenges just to get me started:



So for this one I have to run seven miles. That's it. Some of them, however, are pretty challenging - made for only the hardcore runners you hear stories about. But the competition is there, and I could feel the motivational effects before I even took my first run. After reading some of the challenges, I wanted to lace up my Nikes and get started on those challenges.

Forums, a store, customizable maps of your routes - the whole thing is pretty comprehensive. One thing that turned me off, though, was the site's Flash interface. Sometimes it would grind to a halt, and the transitions between the site's areas were painfully slow. I did try a desktop application, HERE, but it may take me a while to get the hang of it.

I still have to get out and try the Nike+ kit on a true run, but until then I'm pretty well impressed. As the running season goes along, I'll report anything else I find. But I've picked my "Powersong" (KMFDM's "DIY"), I've got my iTunes playlist ready, and my shoes are broken-in.

Someone cue "Eye of the Tiger."

Attack of the iPod People

Sing to me, O Muse!

Sing to me of idyllic design; of new-age craftsmanship and the beauty of plastic. Sing to me of a card-deck-sized music box, simple in function, gorgeous in intuition, and gleaming in glossy white.

Sing to me, O Muse, of my new 30 GB Apple iPod.

A mere two months after purchasing my iBook I made the plunge and bought the little machine that everyone adores.

Saturday I braved the freezing rain and made a pilgrimage to an Apple store at the Novi Twelve Oaks mall. I knew it was my kind of store when I saw a two-foot high round table set up with iMacs and kids’ video games. A family-friendly computer store, and the place literally buzzing with high-powered Apple products. This was heaven.

I hadn’t seen a new G5 iMac up close, or the new Power Macs (with brushed metal and solid, industrial design), so I played around and saw what the specs were on each machine. Then I played with the iPods – and fell in love.

Andrea called to find out when I’d be in Royal Oak for Shanita’s birthday shin-dig. “Right after I get done with my orgasm,” I think I told her.

My biggest quandary was video iPod vs. iPod Nano. Did I want the elegant, tiny Nano (with swell arm-band for my walks in the park), or the full-on, half-my-hard drive video version? I saw Cassandra’s video (for “Gold Digger,” no less) and was impressed. Videos looked darned sharp on a screen so small. And besides, I liked the idea of fitting 7,500 of my songs instead of 1,000 or so.

And white was a must-have. It can’t clash with my iBook.

But before I made the decision, I went accessories shopping. After all, half the fun of owning an iPod was getting all the cool stuff with it.

Arm bands, cases, leather pouches, stereo hook-ups, radio frequency adaptors – there was a lot to choose from. Not to get ahead of myself, I figured a hookup for my home stereo and a dock would be good enough.

I went up to the hip-looking Apple guy (this was Novi – everyone is either hip or beautiful) and asked him if my accessories were cool enough, and where I could buy my pretty iPod. He disappeared behind the counter, iPod in-hand, and rang me up on his little hand-held cash register. He even e-mailed me my receipt. This was twenty-first century shopping.

The iPod is a thing of beauty. The scroll wheel, the sharp color display, the signature white ear buds – it made me feel good to live in a capitalist country. This was the market at work: iPods control about 85 percent of the MP3-player market, and for good reason. Who wants a clunky, cheap piece of crap? No, if you’re going to carry something around to play your favorite songs (or videos, or photos, or whatever), there’s going to have to be a connection. You have to be on friendly terms. I could be friends with my iPod.

Plus you can download programs to make the darned thing a low-end Palm Pilot. Calendars, address book, reminders and alarm clocks. Like my iBook, this was one expensive personal organizer. But why not?

And all this was just the logical conclusion to my recent Mac obsession. I’ve “switched” mind, body and soul.

Now, with an iPod, it’s official.